How To Know If Your Husband Is Cheating (Signs of Cheating)

how to know if your husband is cheating

There are plenty of ways to know if your husband is cheating or hiding something. While it’s important to trust your instincts, there are several signs that can indicate a cheater. 

First and foremost, if your husband suddenly becomes more secretive with his phone or computer, that could be a red flag. If he starts taking calls in another room or seems to be messaging suspiciously often, that could also be a sign.

Other signs might include a sudden disinterest in intimacy with you, spending more time away from home, or being less affectionate or attentive than usual.

If you’ve noticed any of these signs, it’s important to address this as soon as you can muster up the courage, you need to plan what you are going to say with evidence and clear signs of why you are thinking this way (more on what to say below)

Ultimately, trust and open communication are the keys to any healthy relationship if that is gone then is more or less over.

What are the first signs of cheating?

The first sign of cheating is when the person starts acting differently. They might start dressing differently, change their routine or become more secretive about their phone or computer usage.

If they start spending time away from home without telling you where they are going, this could also be a sign of cheating.

Another sign of cheating is if they begin spending a lot more time with friends and family members than before and neglects their responsibilities at home.

If your partner has been acting strange lately and you have reason to believe that they are cheating on you there are a few things you can do to get find our for sure.

Quick Check List:

There are a lot of red flags that can point to infidelity, including:

  • Your partner spends less time with you.
  • He’s not as interested in sex.
  • Increased phone time activity.
  • Lots of messages.
  • Loss of appetite for things they used to enjoy together.
  • Unusual behavior such as unexplained absences and secrecy.

What should I do if I think my husband is cheating?

If you suspect that your husband is cheating on you, the first step is to remain calm and gather your thoughts. It can be an extremely emotional and challenging situation to deal with, but it’s important to approach the situation rationally.

It’s essential to communicate openly and honestly with your partner, expressing your concerns and discussing any evidence you may have. However, you should avoid making any assumptions, accusing them without any proof, or jumping to conclusions (see below for some ideas of questions you can ask)

Ultimately, only you can decide if you want to try to work through this with your partner or end the relationship. Remember that your happiness and well-being should always come first.

If you think your husband is cheating, there are a few things that you can do. 

If he is not cheating, then it might be something else that’s bothering him and you should try to figure out what it is are there money issues or something or someone bothering him at work? Men often have complicated feelings that they bottle up or try to hide. If you think he’s cheating on you because he’s behaving differently, tread carefully. My advice is to observe.

First, observe your own feelings and insecurities and how they differ from yours. Give it a few weeks and see what really changes.

Steps you can take before you accuse your husband of cheating with another woman.

  • Gather evidence: Before confronting your husband, gather as much evidence as possible to support your suspicion. This may include emails, text messages, or phone records.
  • Plan what to say: Decide what you want to say to your husband and how you want to say it. Try to remain calm and avoid being accusatory or confrontational.
  • Choose the right time and place: Choose a time and place where you can talk privately and without interruptions. Avoid discussing the issue in public or in front of others unless you feel unsafe around him, think about his reaction.
  • Be honest and direct: When you confront your husband, be honest and direct about your concerns. Use “I” statements to express how you feel, and avoid blaming or attacking your partner.
  • Listen to his response: Allow your husband to respond to what you have to say. Listen carefully to his explanation and try to understand his perspective.
  • Consider seeking professional help: If you are struggling to cope with the situation or need support, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor.

What are things you can say to ask your husband if he is cheating to draw him out?

  • “I have noticed some changes in our relationship lately. Is there something going on that you want to talk about?”
  • “I feel like there has been a distance between us lately. Is there anything that’s been bothering you?”
  • “I have a gut feeling that something is not right. Can we talk about it?”
  • “I love you and I want to make sure we are both happy in this relationship. Is there something that you feel is missing?”
  • “I want to trust you completely, but I’m having a hard time with some things. Can we talk about it honestly?”

Remember, it is important to approach the situation calmly and thoughtfully. Avoid being confrontational or accusatory, and try to create a safe space where your husband feels comfortable opening up to you.

Listen with intention take in all the if information and then make your mind up.  Remember if his cheating there are some body language tips you can use to figure this out.  Find out more below.

Still Think he His Cheating

If you still think he’s cheating, the best thing to do is to confront him with your suspicions.

If you think he might be cheating on you, then the next step would be to confront him about the issue. You may want to bring up any evidence that supports your claim and see how he responds.

The best way to do this is in a cool, calm collective way. Don’t just confront him or accuse him outright, he may just clam up or worst, fire back at you in anger.

The best way is to ask him a few questions before you start to probe him. Ask how their day was, simple questions, and then use a technique from Chris Voss’s book Never Split the Difference. Say “It seems like you have a lot on your mind lately.” Or something similar. What did they say?

You are looking for signs that they are avoiding you, or won’t sit down with you. If they do sit down with you, are they acting differently? Most people who lie or cheat will avoid looking you in the eye, or will look away or down.

They may also rub their nose when they are speaking with you as you ask questions. A big sign of stress is if their blink rate goes up or through the roof (keep an eye on this as you have your conversation).

At this point, it’s important to say that no one piece of body language can tell you if someone is lying. You have to read between the lines. They may simply be under stress.

Change of Behavior Shift in your spouse.

You’ve been with your husband for years; some of you know his routines, his behavior. You can pick up on it instinctively. Sudden changes in their body language, facial expression, or speech patterns can be a good indicator that something has drastically changed in their lives.

Subtle signs to look out for when confronting your spouse.

  • Eye blocking.
  • Turning away.
  • Not wanting to talk with you.
  • Becoming angry.
  • Changing the topic.
  • Avoiding eye contact.
  • The story keeps changing.
  • Sweating
  • Rubbing their necks.
  • Repetition of the question to buy time.
  • Fading source at the end of a sentence.
  • Single shoulder shrug.

Out Right Ask If your Husband is cheating.

As long as you feel safe and really want to get to the bottom of his behavior and you have tried everything else. Ask him “Are you cheating on me” The response you are looking for is “NO” and some kind of emotional response. The reason for the NO response is so they can get across to you that they are being honest.

However, if they respond with “I would never do that”,” I have too much to lose” “ I can’t believe you would think I would do that”, or “It is not in my nature to do something like that” “ I love you, I would never do anything like that to you” I would never cheat”: then go into a string of convincing statements, then, unfortunately, you have your answer.

If this does not work, then it’s time for some detective work on your part.

What are some signs that show that your husband has cheated on you?

Cheating husband

The signs that show that your husband has cheated on you are not always easy to spot. You need to be aware of the red flags in order to identify the most common signs of infidelity.

Some of the most common signs that show that your husband has cheated on you are:

  • If he suddenly becomes secretive about his phone or computer usage.
  • If he is spending more time outside than usual
  • If he is suddenly more interested in sex than before
  • If he is dressing differently than before

What are your most common suspicions while your husband is away?

Many women have suspicions about their husbands while they are away. But, the most common suspicions are about their fidelity.

Men can be very thoughtful and caring when they are away from their wives. They might send love notes or gifts to show that they care for them. However, it is hard to know for sure if the man is being faithful when he is away.

If you love him, you have to trust him. If you don’t trust him, you need to ask yourself why. Are you insecure? Has he cheated on you before? What has happened to make you feel this way?

Talk to him first only if you feel there’s something off about his behavior or if you have some sort of proof. Avoid forcing a confrontation, because it may end up backfiring your relationship.

How can you deal with your suspicions?


It is important to be able to deal with your suspicions in a healthy manner. If you suspect that someone is cheating on you, it is best to talk about it with them and try to work things out. Let him know you care about him and want to know he feels the same way about you too.

I often travel for long hours and stay away for days at a time. I constantly call my wife in the evening when I’m away or check in with her on FaceTime or a phone call.

Saying nothing and trying to find proof will only make the situation worse.

Final Thoughts

How to know if your husband is cheating on is a difficult topic the truth is, there are so many signs that your husband may be cheating on you. It can be hard to tell if you’re just being paranoid or if he really is cheating.

Going with your gut static is a good way to figure this out and also with some solid proof such as he spends less time with you than normal, you find out about new women through his social media accounts, he starts missing important events in your life like birthdays or family dinners, he starts coming home later than usual and has no explanation for why he starts hiding things from you like phone numbers or passwords.

I hope you found the article useful and that your husband doesn’t cheat if you have found this post useful check out What Are The Signs He Will Cheat On Me Again? (Red Flag)

If he does, it’s his loss because there are plenty more fish in the sea. Good luck!

Phil Taylor Author Body Language Matters
Phil Taylor Author Body Language Matters

Founder Phil Taylor

Phil Taylor, the founder of, embarked on a journey to unravel the secrets of non-verbal communication and to delve deep into the intricacies of body language. His passion didn’t stop there; it expanded to encompass various realms of psychology. A professional hypnotherapist and a master of close-up magic, Phil possesses a vast reservoir of knowledge and understanding in the field of communication. His multifaceted experiences have honed his expertise, turning him into a formidable force in the exploration of human interaction.

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