Touching Your Shoulder Body Language (Can Give The Game Away)

  • By: Phil Taylor
  • Time to read: 4 min.
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A shoulder touch is a social signal in which one person touches the other person’s shoulder. It is typically used to express connection, support, encouragement, or comfort.

The meaning of the touch depends on the context and can vary greatly.

When done properly, it can be used to improve connection, build rapport and show empathy.

The shoulder and arm are some of the few places we don’t mind being touched. In the Western world, it’s considered a normal courtesy.

Men touching men on the shoulder is usually where this is seen most often. If you’re a man touching a woman’s shoulder, it could be seen as a negative action. So it’s best not to do it unless you’re in a relationship with them.

We use it when we want to start to build a rapport with a person or we feel comfortable and confident enough around that person to touch them on the shoulder.

What does a shoulder touch mean

Single shoulder touch can mean many things. It can be a flirtatious or friendly gesture.

There are six possible meanings to a shoulder touch.

  1. A single touch on your shoulder is an invitation to talk about what’s bothering you.
  2. It may be a signal to make room for someone else by moving closer.
  3. A person who is attracted to you might touch your shoulder because they are interested in you romantically.
  4. People use this gesture when they are feeling aggressive or dominating in order to show dominance over another person.
  5. The person may be trying to make contact with you and let you know that they like your company or conversation and want more of it.
  6. Deliberately building rapport

Body language touching your own shoulder.

Touching one’s own shoulder can signal comfort. It is a non-verbal cue that can be interpreted as a sign of comfort.

The individual may have an itch, but it can also be a way of comforting oneself or to signify self-consciousness.

Body language when someone touches your shoulder.

When someone touches your shoulder, it is usually to get your attention or show that they care. This action can also be interpreted as flirtatious more than anything else.

The way the person who touches you on your shoulder moves their hand can be used to interpret their intentions.

For example, if the person who touched you moves their hand up towards your neck or head, then it could be a sign of attraction or flirting.

If the person’s fingers are spread apart and they move their fingers around then it is typically not a sign of attraction but instead, it could be a sign they are trying to suppress you or hold you down.

Context is key to reading body language.

When a girl keeps touching your shoulder.

When a girl keeps touching your shoulder, it can mean a few different things.

It could be that she is trying to get your attention, she is playing with you, or it could also be that she is flirting with you.

In order to find out what someone’s intentions are when they keep touching your shoulder, it is important to pay attention to the other person’s body language as well as their statement/comments.

One way to tell if the person touching your shoulder wants you to talk to them or if they want something else from you would be if they touch their own face afterward.

If the person touches their face after touching your shoulder and then looks at you in a seductive manner, then they are likely flirting with you and will want more from the situation than just conversation.

Is shoulder touching flirting.

It depends on the context you see or feel someone touching your shoulder. When someone touches your shoulder, it’s usually a good sign.

They’re trying to get your attention, build trust, and feel comfortable enough to physically reach out and touch you. It’s a good body language cue.

What it means when a guy touches your shoulder.

If a guy touches your shoulder in public what does it mean?

It’s not always easy to understand what someone’s intentions are when they touch your shoulder. It could be even more difficult if you don’t know the person.

If you’re in a public place, usually touching your shoulder means that the person just wants to get your attention or that they’re simply being friendly.

However, if it happens during a date or at work then it could have a different meaning. It could mean they want to get closer to you physically.

It’s important to think about the context and the conversation you’re having.

What does it mean if a boy touches your shoulder.

This is a very common question that I get from my clients.

The answer to this question varies depending on the context in which it occurs.

If a boy touches your shoulder while passing you on the street, then it means that he is acknowledging you and doesn’t have any malicious intention.

However, if a boy touches your shoulder while at a party, his intentions may be to get your attention for whatever reason.


In body language touching your shoulder can mean different things depending on the context and how it was done.

It can be a friendly gesture or an innocent move to get somebody’s attention. Or it could also be an intimate sign of affection. Context is key when reading body language. If you would like to learn how to read body language check this article out here.